Author: mikendaplant

Today the Moffles are supporting @YoungMindsUK and saying #HelloYellow for World Mental Health Day. Because our children’s and young people’s mental health matters.

The theme of 2022’s World Mental Health Day, set by the World Federation for Mental Health, is ‘Make mental health and wellbeing for all a global priority’.

Let’s remember we all share a common humanity and a responsibility for creating communities where everyone knows that both their mental & physical health is valued, and that they matter. Good health and healing happen in caring relationships and societies.

Kinship families in the UK are raising over 200,000 children. They do this with love & commitment & determination to keep children in their family networks & communities. For many children, kinship care is the right choice & they thrive.  

But kinship carers can face challenges. Too often arrangements are not properly recognised or funded. The responsibility is life changing & many carers take it on at personal cost to their own plans, finances, relationships, & health. Their children may have complex emotional & behavioural needs from difficult life experiences & accessing specialist support can be hard.

When a child has experienced relational trauma, they can feel surrounded by many frightening ghosts. Processing painful experiences and moving on from the past can take a lot of time and support.

Have patience to help them explore their fear and sadness – build their emotional resources and trust in your relationship. Nurture confidence that they can find comfort with you, have adventures, and find joy in the world. Leave the haunted house and build a castle to live in together, full of light, opportunity, and hope.

Healing requires that you be a gentle gardener of your soul. Nurture it with the sunshine of empathy, and water it with curiosity. Dig carefully for self-understanding. Tend to your roots and be sure to plant yourself in a place that gives you sustenance and shelter. Be open to the kindness of yourself and others and let this help you to grow strong.

‘If someone you love has gone, how can you ever feel whole again?’ asked the little Moffle.

‘Hold them in your heart and they’re never far away. They’ll see the sunset and hear the birdsong through your eyes and ears. They’re with you always’.

Today is an emotive day, as the funeral for Queen Elizabeth II is held in London. Whether or not you are a royalist, remember loss triggers loss. All thoughts and feelings are ok. They just are and they need no evaluation. Be PACE-ful and kind to yourself & others.

Stories remind us that we are not alone. They create opportunities to explore, remember & forget, without fear. They give us hope to imagine different endings and better possible worlds.

  For children especially, the natural language for expressing feeling is through images & stories. It is so important to find ways to help our children articulate their stories & understand them.  We know that one of the indicators of good mental health is being able to hold a coherent narrative about your life – a joined up story that expresses the thoughts, feelings & motives of self & others in the story.

When a child is hurting, never forget the power of unconditional acceptance. There’s great comfort to be found in attuned relationships, feeling seen and loved exactly as we are.

Try not to fear your emotions – they are the energy of life itself. Honour them all equally, with curiosity and acceptance. When we accept our own struggles and strong feelings, it’s easier to see others as dear souls doing the best they can. And remember, just like the weather or the rising & setting of the sun, everything is transient, nothing stays the same.

All we have is this moment, right here and now, so stay open to it, make peace with it, and experience it to the fullest. Remind yourself, this too will pass.

Children learn most from what we do. Try to treat yourself as you would a good friend. Looking after yourself is the foundation for looking after others and maintaining those key principles of playfulness, acceptance, curiosity and empathy, when the going gets tough.